Imagine Muggleborns having patronuses that represent something from Muggle culture that they feel protected by. A shy Hufflepuff with a Pikachu patronus. A Slytherin who’s really nervous because of all the stuff in the past and they’re Muggleborn but they cast a patronus and it’s one of the Game of Thrones dragons. A Gryffindor being the talk of the common room because of their Jaeger patronus. A Ravenclaw with a comic obsession finding out their patronus is the Hulk.
I’ve been doing this for years so I thought I’d share. If you’re not sure if a number is long distance or local, and you’re adding them as a contact on your mobile phone, just put “+1” in front of the number. This works for any number in Canada and the USA, and when you try to call them, the phone will automatically adjust for local or long distance. No need to hear the phone sass you if you did or didn’t dial 1 incorrectly or anything like that.
men like girls who “don’t know they are beautiful” because they are afraid that one day you will realise that you are the sun and the stars and he is nothing but a discarded plastic bag clogging up the ocean that you are
(I work the floor at an independently-owned menswear store. The owner, my boss, spends a lot of time at the shop, and tries to keep prices as low as possible to help our city’s large homeless population get good job interview clothes. A clearly homeless man is wandering around the store. The other patrons are giving him looks.)
Customer:“Excuse me, sir?”
Customer:“I think you may want to call security. That… bum over there, he keeps feeling the suits and muttering to himself. I’m just sure he’s planning to steal one.”
Me:“Well, ma’am, I think that’s quite unlikely.”
Customer:“Oh, come on, you know how they are! I mean, I’d keep an eye on him even if he wasn’t homeless!”
(The homeless man in question happens to be Hispanic.)
Me:“We don’t discriminate here, ma’am.”
Customer:“Well, I’m sure the owner would want to hear about this!”
(I give in and call him over. The customer explains her concerns. As a black man, my boss isn’t happy with her racism, but agrees to talk to the homeless man.)
Owner:“Excuse me, sir, are you finding what you need?”
Homeless Man:“Well, not really. I’m hoping for something versatile in a dark or navy wool, but most of the options in my size are cut American style instead of European, which fits me a little better. Not to mention they’re all pinstriped, which I really don’t have the build for, you know?”
Owner:“I… yes, I understand. I think we may have some options over here, if you’ll follow me. How did you know all that?”
Homeless Man:“Back before I lost my job, I used to be really into this stuff. I’m not looking for anything fancy, just something I can use to look good for a job interview later today.”
(My boss helps him find something he likes, and comes to the counter with him. The suit is priced at $87.)
Homeless Man:*digging in his pockets* “Hang on, I think I’ve got enough.”
Owner:*to me* “Take my card. I’m buying it for him.” *to the homeless man* “Here. The suit’s yours, on one condition. After your interview today, you come back and apply for a job here too. Got it?”
Homeless Man:“I… oh my God, thank you. Thank you so much.”
(Two years later, that formerly-homeless man is my manager, and has a little girl with his new wife—the owner’s sister.)
So every morning I get off the train and start my 20 minute walk to work, and there’s this guy who’s always like 3 steps ahead of me and always beats me to the street corner bc I get stopped by the light and he passes it. but today I was ahead of him for the first time and he RUNS in front of me, turns around and goes “I’ve been winning for 2 months now, can’t stop now, have a good day, see you tomorrow.” tmrw I swear i’m wearing running shoes to work.
1. I really love playing tennis. Sometimes I make a lot of comparisons between life and tennis. 2. I’m allergic to strawberries but I don’t care because I can still eat mangoes. 3. I’m still debating if I want laser eye surgery in the future or if I can accept wearing spectacles for the rest of my life. 4. I really want to get a job in California or Hawaii, but I’m still not sure what just yet. 5. I want sexy back muscles.